Pride

Throughout the scriptures, Pride is mentioned as a serious sin that has caused many problems and destroyed relationships. It is a sin that holds on tightly to its victims and is very hard to break free from. When pride enters a marriage both the husband and wife suffer. Because of pride, couples can grow apart over time and ultimately the marriage will fail if the sin is not addressed.

A lot of the worlds ideas today are about doing things for yourself and spending as much time as possible treating yourself to the many pleasures of the world with no regard to those around you. Taking care of oneself and being selfish are two totally different things. Taking care of oneself is about working out, doing hobbies and taking a break every so often to help release stress. Selfish and prideful actions are about backing out when times get hard, putting too much emphasis on "me time" and pushing our loved ones away to spend time and money in a way that only benefits them. This behavior is very toxic in marriage and sadly there are many couples who suffer from of it.

When a spouse becomes prideful, their thoughts and words are not longer positive and uplifting, but selfish and demeaning. They will argue that their needs are not being met and that it is the fault of their significant other. These childish thoughts and actions are contrary to the Lord's plan for us. He has commanded that we put in the effort and always be ready to work hard and help those around us. A prideful attitude will hurt those in your life if it stands uncorrected. Working to change your behavior and repenting of the sinful actions and thoughts are the best ways to change and cast off pride. It is possible to change but it will only happen when the heart is changed and humility replaces pride and one asked the Lord to help soften their heart.

In Dr Gottman's book The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work(2015) Dr Gottman explained that often in marriage, husbands and wives will disregard their spouses advice and wishes. They will do what they please without even thinking of what their significant other might say about the situation. Whether it is a simple change to the family schedule or a large purchase at the store, some people will do what they please even when they should be counseling with their spouse. Dr Gottman also explained that after an extensive study of "130 newlywed couples... when a man is not willing to share power with his partner there is a 81 percent chance that the marriage will self-destruct"(pg, 116) Not allowing your spouse's influence to guide you to be better and to hold on to your standards is a form of pride. The selfish actions can cause strain on the marriage and will ruin the sacred trust that has been built up over the years.

Doing our best to always have our spouses interests in mind will strengthen our marriage and bring us close to our Father in heaven through selfless actions and thoughts. Being selfless is the ultimate form of Christlike love. The Lord in his time on this earth spent his days being selfless through helping anyone who came along. He did not pass up an opportunity to serve. If we strive to have the same mindset in our marriages, we will surely cast off any chances of becoming prideful. We will strengthen our marriage and the love that we have for our Father in Heaven and our spouse will grow.